Maroon 5

This band represents an age old form of annoyismatic annoyingism. With their perfect 5 o'clock beards and skinny jeans, who are these guys kidding? What is worse than having a good looking guy singing froo-froo Broadway Rock stuck in your head? Nothin. "This/Love/Has taken control/Of me" Fuck. Now it will be in my head for at least a week. It's obnoxious and annoying to say the least. If the songs were remotely valid, I'd respecet myself in the morning. But humming along to the stuff that 13 year old girls get off to, unacceptable.

Will she be loved? WILL SHE?

Look at those sailors. How can you get any good sailing done, when all you see is that sweet guitar players licks. Damnit. It's understandable why these sailor folk like these guys at least. They have much in common. For one, they both don't mind spending every day, out on the corner [sailboat] in the pouring rain. Secondly...well there is no second thing in common yet, but who knows, maybe their next album will feature some good pirate music. I hope not.