I don't think many will disagree with this one. My annoyance with this vehicle is so intense, I can hardly think about it without popping a vein in my head. Ughh. As if being exhausted is not enough at this god-awful hour, I have to deal with the MOST ANNOYING PEOPLE IN NEW YORK. Allow me to take you through my morning experience:
8:35 rolls around. Fuck, I'm late. Better take the L instead of the calm 14th street bus so I can make it to work on time. I walk down the stairs toward the cavernous bacteria hole that is the L train station to see some heavy woman with way too much lipstick approaching. As I shimmy to my right, she annoyingly chooses her left, leaving us face to face as a crowd of annoying douche bags pile behind me. I concede and allow the lady, who I swear looks like she belongs in the 80's/90's hit, "Designing Women" exit as I and the rest of the westward bound tribe wait to enter.
I continue down towards the tracks to find that the train has just
enough room for 2-3 more people. Alas, I am one of those people. Made it, I exhale. Then I hear it. "We are being held in the station due to train delays." Those words are especially annoying. "Close the fucking doors", I mutter only to attract some dirty looks. Fuck you, you're annoying. This is when some asshole with a trench coat decides to push his way in. He is followed by three more assholes, the last of whom, is the most annoying person I've ever seen. This is because he is literally shoving me into this guy (see photo on right). "I'm sorry...I'm being pushed," I have to explain to the relatively attractive girl I eventually hit. Even the good looking ones begin to annoy me.
enough room for 2-3 more people. Alas, I am one of those people. Made it, I exhale. Then I hear it. "We are being held in the station due to train delays." Those words are especially annoying. "Close the fucking doors", I mutter only to attract some dirty looks. Fuck you, you're annoying. This is when some asshole with a trench coat decides to push his way in. He is followed by three more assholes, the last of whom, is the most annoying person I've ever seen. This is because he is literally shoving me into this guy (see photo on right). "I'm sorry...I'm being pushed," I have to explain to the relatively attractive girl I eventually hit. Even the good looking ones begin to annoy me. Then comes possibly the most annoying aspect of the L Train. 3rd Avenue. A train stop in 
between 1st Avenue and Union Square is the most pointless idea since Charlie Sheen's 1997 "Shadow Conspiracy." Really? A stop 1 block from Union Square (the next stop)? Could this exist only to annoy? I think so.
between 1st Avenue and Union Square is the most pointless idea since Charlie Sheen's 1997 "Shadow Conspiracy." Really? A stop 1 block from Union Square (the next stop)? Could this exist only to annoy? I think so. This is when 1, maybe two annoying people decide they want to be "original" and get out. These annoying people have to part a sea of other annoying people, myself included at this point, to get off the train. I step out of the train to allow them to exit. How nice of me? Well, the 2 new westward bound 3rd avenue people that want to join this fiasco shimmy their way in before I have the chance to get back in. Not happening. God, that is annoying. Now I am on the verge of shoving.
Union square arrives to my delight. 60% of the train empties. The annoyance fizzles and I make my way to work, annoyed and relieved simultaneously. I love New York.
1 comment:
The truth!
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